Thursday, February 5, 2009

Breastfeeding Tips Needed

Hey girls! I would like to solicit the successful breastfeeders out there...I have much admiration I wanted to ask some advice. I realize that each of you will tell me something different, but I'm still curious to hear it straight you gals that have made it work.

1) I have yet to give J a pacifier yet b/c the lactation consultant in the hospital suggested not to give him one for awhile due to nipple confusion. I'm not sure I buy into all of that, but I am still hesitant. He has been extremely fussy (even after eating, changing, etc) the past 24 hours and I'm wondering if I should try it out or if I should hold out until he is older like all the books and docs suggest. I realize at the end of the day I make the decision that best works for me and for baby J--but I would appreciate your opinion.

2) When did you start pumping? I have yet to try that one out too due to mixed advice I've received about messing with my milk supply and introducing a bottle too early. I'm very committed to sticking with the breastfeeding and I want to make sure I'm getting the right advice--where better to get advice then woman who have been through it--so thanks in advance! =)

3) When can I have a drink (I promise, not the bottle yet) and how do you do it as far as timing? I've read such conflicting stuff as far as how much and what age--I'm nervous to try it, but I sure could use a little glass of something!

4) What foods should I be avoiding? Again, I keep hearing/reading different stuff and I want to make sure I'm not eating anything that is causing his little tummy to hurt. I would love to know what you did.

Any other advice is much appreciated. I have my MIL here now and she did not bfeed any of her kids so I'm having a hard time explaining some of this to her when I don't even understand it myself. I've made it almost 3 weeks with only having to give him one small formula bottle and I just don't want to give in!!! Thanks in advice for your advice. Y'all are the best!


stepht said...

Hi! In terms of the pacifier.. try it - if it works - great! It never affected my son's nursing.

I would HIGHLY recommend pumping now. Not necessarily to build up a reserve, but to give your husband the opportunity to give J a bottle once a day. This is hands down the BEST advice I received. This way, J won't protset when it is time to give him a bottle down the line and it lets your hubby have that bonding time with him.

In terms of drinking, have a glass of wine after your nurse! By the time he eats again, you will be fine.

Good luck - enjoy these sweet, snuggly days!!!

Anonymous said...

I gave both of my children pacifiers, and they did fine with breastfeeding. I did not follow the literature in the books. I fed them cereal @ 2 weeks, baby food @ 3 months, and table food @ 9months. They are average sized children. They eat good, and they rarely get sick. My sister-in-law followed what the lactation consultant and books said. In the end, after dealing with a fussy baby for weeks, she gave her little one a pacifier, and she continued to breastfeed until 12 months without introducing foods until about 8 months. She is a very picky eater, and she gets sick easily. So, as far as books and experts go, sometimes the good old fashioned feeding habits work just as well.

Avery Alexander said...

I breastfed till my little girl was 6 months old and I have to say determination is the best key. I gave Avery a paci immediatley in the hospital and she did fine with breastfeeding. As far as pumping I went back to work at 6 weeks and I started pumping around week 3 or 4 to get a supply started for daycare. Medela is the absolute best pump. I waited a while before I had a drink but as long as you wait I think at least 4 hours after one glass it's fine. I had a really hard time finding a bottle that Avery would take and by luck she was using the Nuk pacifiers and they started making bottles with the same type of nipple. So she had no problems. Avery fed every 2-3 hours. They say that if your breastfeeding they eat more often than with formula. Formula it's ususally ever 4 hours so you will have to feed more often. Enjoy every minute of it because it's so worth it. It really helps boost their immune system and is so healthy for them. Good luck and if you have any more questions at all don't hesitate to ask.

rachel said...

Congrats on your beautiful baby! I've bf my only child for going on 9 months. It's a huge undertaking, so you should be proud of yourself for making it this far!

The only comment I have is to go with your instincts. I gave my baby a pacifier when she was in the hospital. It never interfered with her feeding ability. She knew when she was getting milk! :) She loves her paci, it has definitely comforted her.

I probably gave her a pumped bottle at 4-6 weeks. She went back and forth fine for months.

You're a great mom, and you're doing a great job! Listen to the advice, but at the end of the day do what you are most comfortable with!

Leslee said...

all babies have the natural instinct to suck--a pacifier is soothing to the baby so by all means try it--you can read allyou can and you can lisen to all that you do, but do not forget 'mother's instinct'..this is such a beautiful time, so enjoy it--if you have any apprehensions, baby J will pick up on it and that will only makes your time fretful..enjoy this blessed time!
P.S. love Stepht's rec for the little glass of wine--

A Balancing Act in Heels said...

Your son is adorable!! I never breastfed, because I wasn't comfortable with it, so I pumped and bottlefed both my kids right after birth. They were never interested in the pacifier either. All babies are different, so just go home and ask your little guy. He'll give you a sign. :)

Ashley, Kyle, and Baby Boy said...


i gave my son a pacifier from day ONE and he nursed great...he also got a bottle from day one and he nursed great- we always did a night time bottle bc it gave me a break and gave daddy a chance to feed!
every kid is different, but we kept that same bottle consistent and we never had any nipple confusion at any other time of the day.

pumping- uh, i hated it!! i was not good at it, but if you schedule time to do it, and make yourself do it, it's nice to have...i never found the time and i would rather be bonding with baby or resting than pumping- that was just me though...i had to wait about a week and a half before the pump would actually get milk increased through time but was VERY slow going at first. be patient with pumping, but not push it...if your son is a good nurser, it's not important...also, if you're ok with formula, find a formula that works for your son and have that on hand for just in cases...we did that with my son and he was able to go back and forth very easily...

foods to stay away from: broccoli, asparagus, brussel sprouts- most things green....too much of any one thing...i limited my dairy intake sure to take a calcium vitamin if you do that...

drinking- i was VERY cautious about this bc i knew that it might be a rough night and baby might want to nurse in the middle of the night instead of sleep through the night, so i felt i couldn't have a drink for just in cases....there are strips out there that you can buy to tell you if you're at an ok level or not...i never really felt comfortable with it until my son was sleeping through the night and not needing to nurse before his morning feeding...

nursing takes lots of patience!!

but know that bottles and formula are good too!
if its stressing you out, not working, or the try try again method is just wearing you out....that's ok!! spend the time with baby j, loving on him, playing with him, bonding with him instead of stressing over nursing- a friend of mine missed the entire first three months of her baby's life because she was running from lactation consultant to lactation consultant and working on breastfeeding and pumping all day long....she finally switched to formula and she has the happiest healthiest bottle fed baby ever!

so....that being patient with nursing, it's an amazing wonderful thing...but do it at your own pace and do what is best for you- try not to listen too much to what 'nursing natzis' (sp) say because it's all about what WORKS FOR YOU!!

I breastfed my son for 8.5 months and then we both decided it was time to that time he was nursing three times a day and getting one bottle.


hqm said...

I nursed all three girls...they used pacifiers, I pumped immediatly, and had an occasional drink...they all turned out fine, I think.
I does take commitment and can be frustrating, but hang in is so worth the bond.

Anonymous said...

I BF all three of mine..each for almost a year...gave them a paci right was a life saver and it never had an affect on my babies nursing..

Pump now..I started right that they would take a bottle from someone else..never did give them any formula..went right from the breat to cow's milk..

It is REALLY important for you to introduce a bottle soon ( with breast milk of course ) if you want someone else besides you to feed them..past six gets harder..

Best advice..get a REALLY good breast pump..if you can't afford a good one, many hospitals will rent you important to have a high quaility breast pump!!

Anonymous said...

I breastfed all 4 of my children for 12-16 months each. It is a joy to share info w others that are intersted and DETERMINED to make it work!
1. Pacifiers never affected my children. I started them w/ each child at 2 weeks. 2 of my children liked it, 2 did not. But, none stopped nursing b/c of it.
2. Start pumping now. Freeze any milk you get even if it's just 2 ounces. 2 ounces one day and 2 the next day makes a 4 ounce bottle for when your out at church or on a date w/ hubby and baby needs a feed.
3. Have a drink after you nurse baby and then wait 2 hours before feeding baby. A small glass of wine or margarita is fine. Your body should absorb most of the alcohol before nursing again.
4. I had to avoid most italian type foods like pizza, spaghetti, lasagna, etc. Something about the sauce. Usually, foods high in garlic and spices will upset a baby's system.
Hope that helps! Congrats and good luck!
Carrie Waco, Tx

Meghan said...

I gave my oldest a pacifier before we left the hospital and he nursed until he was almost 2 1/2 so I don't believe that it causes confusion:)

Regarding pumping, I think that now is a great time to begin giving him a bottle although I personally would limit it to 1 per day for awhile. I have heard that it is harder for them to nurse so some babies will prefer a bottle. I could never stand pumping so it was easier for me to nurse!

Regarding drinking, I was never too concerned but would obviously limit to 1-2 glasses and usually after I nursed.

Some foods that may upset their tummies are garlic, broccoli, beans, spicy foods, dairy - pretty much the same foods as an adult. If you are concerned that it is making him fussy you could try to keep a food diary for a few days (a pain but you may see a relationship).

Congratulations and good luck! If you are determined to breastfeed you will do great! It is so much easier IMO...

Anonymous said...

I so disagree with Ahley, Kyle and baby boy on the formula advice..stick with breast feeding, unless you can not do it..
Many children are healthy formula fed babies..but research shows that breast feed babies have a reduced risk of child hood cancer's and terminal illness..even breast feeding for 3 months greatly reduces cancer in they age and even into adulthood..that alone is worth sticking to the breast feeding!!

Shawn said...

I am an avid reader of your blog. Congrats on motherhood and your gorgeous little man!
You should absolutely start pumping now. It helps to maintain the supply especially since your son was born with an anterior frenulum (tongue tie) son had the same thing and I went to the same doctor on Park Avenue!
A beer or glass of wine is fine, it actually helps with milk production....they used to give new moms Guinness in the hospital in Ireland.

I gave both my kids pacis and it never affected feeding. If you have more questions or concerns, I highly recommend the breast feeding support group at the 92nd Street Y which I believe is on Thurs mornings. They will weigh your baby before you feed him and then after so you can get a sense for how much he is eating from you.
I completely agree with your last poster who said that you need to introduce a bottle with your milk...otherwise they will rebel.
Good luck and hope you are getting some rest!

Katie said...

It's so great that you are nursing and really want to keep going! I know how hard those first few weeks can be!! (It took me almost 8 weeks till me and Amelia got the hang of it and until I actually started to like it! Then she nursed till she 16 months!) Anyway, I gave her a binky when she was about two weeks. I had wanted to wait, too, because I was so worried about nipple confusion. But she had a huge desire to just SUCK and wanted to be at the breast CONSTANTLY. So I tried a binky one night, and it NEVER disrupted her nursing. If you do give a binky, you'll obviously know if it starts to cause a problem and you can stop and work to fix it, you know? I waited till Amelia was right at 6 weeks to give a bottle. Again, she did fine with it and it never disrupted her breastfeeding. She would seem to want more after eating a bottle because it comes so much faster than the breast and so she would fuss and still act hungry for a few minutes after a bottle until her belly realized it was full (because she would be getting the same amt practically as BF'ing). I had my husband give Amelia her first bottle and I purposefully didn't feed her a bottle myself for a couple weeks that way she would still associate ME with BREASTfeeding not the bottle. As for having a drink...I can't exactly remember when I had my fist drink...But I would just have one drink (like a beer or glass of wine) directly after I nursed, and then it would be at least several hrs before she nursed again. I never "pumped and dumped"...I just was careful as to my timing when I had a drink. And as for the food and her tummy, nothing ever seemed to bother her so I never limited myself on any kinds of food really.

Just like you said...when it comes down to it, you do what works for you and your baby and your little family. Breastfeeding takes a lot of patience, sacrifice, and determination. But it is SO worth it, and once you get in the right groove, it is SO EASY! (And free, and convenient, and good for baby, and SWEET!)

Anonymous said...

Hi! My son decided to join us 2 months early so he went straight to the NICU... where they gave him a pacifier.

From birth, he had formula until my milk came in (since he was 2 months early). I alternated between breast milk and formula (and also between a bottle and me and he never seemed to notice). This helped give me some time for me (and build up enough for the next feeding) as well as let my husband bond with him too.

Things that I ate never seemed to affect my son but I have friends that say they could never eat tomatoes when they were nursing.

Like you said, every baby is different - do what seems comfortable to you and you'll be a great mom!

Anonymous said...

Looks like everyone is giving great advice.

The foods to be wary of are broccoli, any kind of bean, Mexican food, spicy foods, and onions. You won't have to be extremely careful like this for the whole breastfeeding time. Just for a few months until his tummy matures a bit more.

Good luck. It sounds like you are doing great. The first time, all of us were full of these same questions.

astiltne said...

I would definitely pump now. It is nice to let your husband take a middle of the night feeding every now and then. My kids were given 1 bottle of formula a day because they were 9 plus and losing a lot of weight waiting for my milk to come in. I stuck with that even after my milk came in so that others could feed them and also it makes it easier when you are traveling. My oldest refused a passy but I forced it on my youngest because it helps reduce the chance of SIDS. Breastfeeding was a peace of cake with my first one and a complete nightmare with the second. He would never latch on correctly and after 2 weeks of misery I gave up and went to straight pumping. It definitely helps if you have a double electric pump. I hope this helps.

Meredith said...

pacifiers -- we decided not to use them ever. we broke down and tried once and my little guy couldn't keep it in his mouth. He found his thumb really early on and we LOVE that he can soothe himself by just sucking his thumb.
pumping -- I fed our little guy, once my milk came in, every four hours at 6am, 10am, 2pm, 6pm, and 10pm. 10 minutes on each side. He learned the schedule and got everything he needed. He was hungry by the time it was time to eat, so he ate really well. It helped my body to get on a schedule as well. (so I didn't nurse him in the middle of the night -- ever) He surpassed his birth weight in less than a week eating like this! I started to pump either after I was done nursing him (after my body was on the schedule) or when I started to drop one of the feedings (when he was older), I would pump during that time instead of nurse. I have a bunch of frozen milk since my little guy wouldn't take a bottle!
a drink -- sometimes, when I thought I was having milk issues (like not making enough), I would have a little bit of beer and since I wasn't nursing during the night, I would have a couple of sips after the 10 pm feeding.
foods to avoid -- I stopped eating pretty much all dairy. (ice cream, I know). I found that my baby was much less fussy if I didn't have dairy.
hope all this helps. and baby J is SO handsome! you are doing a great job!

Brewster Family said...

Congratulations on your new bundle of joy!

I introduced my son to a pacifier when he was a couple of days old. He was fussy and his doctor recommended it. He said that some babies just have the urge to suck (if is a natural reflex). I continued to nurse for 9 months without nipple confusion.

As far as pumping, start early. You want to be sure your little one can also take a bottle in case you have to be away for a couple of hours. Your husband can feed him! This will give your husband the opportunity to bond with J in a special way. Remember, you know him better than anyone! Go with your instincts.

You are doing a great job! Best of luck! He is absolutely adorable!


Anonymous said...

Pacifiers work well with nursing.
My doctor had me sip about two ounces of white wine right after nursing if I wanted to do so. However, only once a day.
Watch out for garlic, a lot of broccoli, cabbage, peppers and spicy foods. These foods won't hurt the baby but will keep you both up as he deals with gas and you deal with him.
Best of luck, he is a cutie.

Anonymous said...

Congrats! I have never commented before, but this is a matter close to my I am breaking my own rules! There are way too many bf-ing nazi's out there and the bottom line is you need to do what works best for you and your baby. you have done an awesome job making it this far so you definitely deserve huge props! What worked for me was- pump now and get a reserve up in the freezer. Pumping sucks, but having your dh give the baby a bottle in the middle of the night makes such a huge difference in your quality of life! Besides, you dont want him to reject bottle later on-- which I know has happened to many moms/babes i know. Pacifiers are god's gift to moms. Baby is nursing fine, so i wouldnt worry about nipple confusion (which i dont really buy anyway).Oh, and give yourself a drink...tonight if you can! It might be an old wives tale, but they say beer increases milk supply (the hops or something). But, you can definitely have one beer or glass of wine right after you feed baby!

Anonymous said...

oh, and the 92nd street bf support group is awesome! if you are at all worried that baby j is not eating enough, the also have scales for weighing before and after. it is on thursday mornings, if I remember correctly....

lisagh said...

Oooooo! Cutie McCute! Love love love his little highness!

heidi at frill seekers gifts ~ tales by the sea said...

congrats! so excited for you. breastfeeding can be a challenge but worth the effort in terms of Baby J's health. you CAN do it. the "binky" a.k.a. pacifier will be a life saver. just try it to calm Baby J. it does give them some comfort and you some peace! just be patient with yourself...babies do not come with instruction books unfortunately. we're rooting for you! heidi

Meagan said...

He is SO CUTE!

I've been breastfeeding for a bit over nine months now, and I assure you it gets easier! I know how you feel about feeling a little alone when with family that never BFed - I've been there! But you'll be amazed at the benefits of breast milk pretty soon and all of your anxiety will disappear. =)

I pumped a few times soon after leaving the hospital and we gave it to our son from a little medicine cup to avoid nipple confusion. Since then, I haven't pumped much (I've never been away long enough that he's needed a bottle - now he can go up to 6 hours before asking to BF!).

We used a pacifier from about three or four weeks, and it didn't affect his latch at all.

With regard to foods to avoid, my lactation consultant said to try to expose him to a variety of things. In her words, "Indian babies get Indian breast milk, and they grow up just fine!" That said, for the first few months I avoided most dairy products because they seemed to make the baby gassy. Now, I can eat whatever I want as far as he is concerned.

As for alcohol, I haven't had any, but I've heard that you can pump a tiny bit of breast milk and dip a test strip in it to confirm that it's not tainted with alcohol. They actually seem fairly popular - you might want to give them a try.

Good luck... the best advice I got was to never give up on a bad day - wait for a good day, and then make a decision.

Katie said...

Hi! I just ran across your blog and saw your adorable son! He is beautiful!

In terms of drinking and breast feeding, you can buy these strips called "Milkscreen" and it will detect how much alcohol is in your breast milk, and if it's safe or not. I used them a few times and I thought they were great.

I also breastfed and pumped- breastfeeding in the day and pumping at night. It worked for us and my supply was good. Good luck!

Mary said...

I agree with the first two comments--that's all I've read! Mine did fine with pacifiers and it helps them calm down!! I pumped after about a week because it helped ease the pain involved in nursing--and then DO give baby a bottle once a day if you can so there is always the possibility of the bottle. I've heard if you hold off too long they have trouble taking one. I did it once a day by a week and a half I think and they both took bottles the whole time, but preferred nursing. I gave the pacifier whenever they wanted it, especially in the middle of the night when I was training them to sleep. Mine both took it even when hungry and then would fall asleep for a little bit longer, teaching them that they don't have to eat to go back to sleep. I also agree about the glass of wine--won't hurt a thing to do it right after you nurse.

Anonymous said...

Both of mine did fine mixing formula bottles, pacifiers and breastfeeding from the get go.

If breastfeeding doesn't work out, don't fret. I felt extremely guilty for quitting but my kids are both healthy, smart, etc. with only 2 months of breast milk. DS#1 is 5 - he's had one ear infection in his life and he scored in the 99.9 percentile on a recent IQ test.

The Cape House said...

I've got no advice, but he's just adorable! Good luck!

Anonymous said...

Try the daughter loved it from day one my son never liked it. I nursed both for 14 months and pregnant with number 3 and plan on doing the same.

Pumping...ugh...never had any luck hours I would try pumping for barely a half of an ounce. You should have good milk supply by now so start trying.

Pump a bottle or two and have someone else give it to him. That way he won't get confused.

Good luck it takes alot to keep nursing don't feel guilty or let other mums make you feel guilty if it doesn't work out.


Julie in Iowa said...

Happened upon your blog via Kelly's Korner. I breastfed both of my sons for 6-7 months. With my first, I REALLY struggled but I had good support from my husband and my mom. My MIL was anti-breastfeeding, so I just chose to ignore her. :-)
The pacifiers never confused either of mine, so I would suggest trying it - especially if he's using YOU as a pacifier. If he's fussy, you may want to try some Mylicon or other gas relief. Dubbed "Magic" in our house, it was great for both of my boys. It is safe to give up to 12 times per day.
Pump now or forever kiss your supply goodbye. I loved my pump and I froze as much as I could because I wanted to have extra once I stopped nursing. (Having the good stuff is GREAT when the kiddos get sick.)
The only food I avoided was garlic because my first born refused to nurse if I had too much garlic. I wouldn't avoid anything else until he has had a bad reaction because the more foods he exposed to through your milk the better. He will be more open to different foods when he's eating table food.
I hope my comments are helpful. Hang in there - you are giving your baby a wonderful gift!

Anonymous said...

Your son it too cute. As far as breastfeeding gets so easy. I never really pumped very much just because that didn't work for me. As far as drinking, I was always told that you could have a glass or two and be fine. If you had more, you could always "Pump and Dump" Ha! Ha! Also, when I was in the hospital after having my little girl the nurse told me not to have lettuce, broccoli, or basically green leafy veggies or chocolate or really any caffine. Like others have said...every child is different so those things my not bother your little boy.
Again...congrats on your precious new addition.

Anneliese said...

First of all gorgeous baby boy. I have a 3 month old baby boy. I have been breast feeding him exclusively since birth. The first 2 weeks were the hardest and then it got easier.

As for the pacifier... We introduced it before we even left the hospital. He wanted to suck for soothing purposes and my breasts could not handle that. We had no problems with nipple confusion. I found it to be a good fix for soothing when after, and btw meals.

As for pumping, that is entirely up to you. As soon as the baby starts sleeping over 5 to 6 hours at night you will need to pump to maintain your milk supply. Also it is good to pump if you need to increase supply. It is good to have extra milk stored in freezer and fridge. We introduced the bottle around 3 weeks with no issues. This was expressed milk I had pumped for a trip out to eat. HE gets a bottle a couple times a week if I run out to do errands etc. Do not wait too long to give him a bottle, or I have heard babies can refuse the bottle.

As for drinking. You can have a drink 1 to 2 times a week. Do not feed the baby until 2 to 3 hours if you have 2 or more drinks. So feed him, then have a drink. I have read that breast feeding is like driving after drinking. If you are ok to drive with your blood alcohol content being low, and feel ok, you are most likely ok to breast feed.

By the way read up on stuff, but every baby is different. I found half of it to be true with my baby. He eats about every 2 to 3 hours and at 3.5 months sleeps at least 10 hours straight at night. Some people will tell you a baby needs formula at night to sleep better. Not true. It is all based on your baby.

Foods...I have found spicy foods, onions, caffeine, a lot of sugar, beans and peanuts can trigger gas and reflux.
Breast feeding is a sacrifice, but worth it in many ways. Good luck!

L y s h a said...

Just found your blog, but thought I'd chime in.

Yes, determination and patience are essential. I had difficulty with both my boys, but remember some is better than none. Pump now! Good luck!

Anonymous said...

I nursed 3 children til they were 14, 16 and 17 months old. The best advise I have is just don't give up. I think many new mommies give up too quick because they think the babies are hungry. Just keep up with it, don't worry about a schedule until you have established your milk supply. If he acts hungry, nurse him no matter when he just ate. Also, if certain food items give you gas it will most likely give the baby gas and cause tummy pain. Oh, and I used a paci right from the start and never had a problem.

Jody said...

I tried to give my babies a pacifier but neither would take it - didn't feel the same I guess.

I would start pumping now and letting someone else feed the baby a bottle a day otherwise you could end up with a baby that won't drink from a bottle or one who suddenly decides to boycott the bottle (I've had both).

I think having a drink after nursing is fine, I've don it.

It is great to have a wonderful support system in place for nursing. I did not get it for my first but when I had my next two I did and it made all the difference. There is just nothing like it.

SCG said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
linda said...

Well it's been 13 years, but I think Stepht advice is what I would second.

He's so cute!!!!

SCG said...

FIRST off DO NOT stress out. I so did with my first. Vowed formula would never touch her lips. And it never did...but let me be the first to tell you that I was a complete basket case. That being said I successfully BF Han until I got pregnant with Hart(10mths.)
Pacifer? Both of my children never had nipple confusion. (Each child is different though.) But I would say that it is worth a shot. If you think he is having problems pull it. But again--no problems here.
Pump? I went back and forth. Seemed just like an extra step I could just skip. No bottles to clean, meal right away...Han never took a bottle after a couple of weeks.
Foods to avoid? Moderation.
Drinks? My neighbors swore that a beer would help my milk production. I am not a big drinker. So I will offer no advice here. ;)

Take it easy girl. RELAX!!!

Whatever makes you the best mommy to this little boy--do it.

All that being said I gave Hart(my second) formula... ;)And she is perfectly fine.

My first was demanding and fussy. My second a breeze. Now when it comes to a sleeping baby I'll be able to give you a tip or two for sure!!!!!

Lisa said...

I truly believe that "mom knows best", go with your gut and do what is right for you not what is right for anyone else. A paci will end up being your best friend! My three never had any problems because of them. My oldest had a lot of stomach issues with my milk. She cried for hours after feedings. I thought she was starving so I would keep trying to feed her, which made her issues even worse and so on and so on. The lactation specialists kept telling me to keep trying, keep feeding her, don't give her formula and sent me on such a guilt trip for questioning the whole bf thing, but I knew something wasn't right. I switched pediatricians and was told (after about a month and a half of pure hell) that I needed to try a soy formula.I did and it was like I had a totally different baby.... a happy one! I felt guilty for really tormenting that poor child for her first month of life. She was able to adjust to some bfeeding and some bottle feeding immediately. My others didn't have problems like the first but I learned from that experience that it was my baby and other people's suggestions were just their opinions. I gave them a bottle once a day and a paci and they were fine.

One more thing: the only time I ever heard of a baby having confusion was when my neighbor followed all of the bfeeding rules (no paci) and four months into it she tried to let her husband give her baby a bottle and the child would go ballistic every time. She even would leave the house for a few hours so the baby wouldn't see her before feeding time and nothing worked. I just think habits are learned from the very beginning so how ever you want it to be, establish that now.

Do what is right for you. Your prince will tell you if it is working or not. Be patient and don't fret over things, you are both new at this. As far as the MIL... ignore her.

Mrs.Preppy said...

I am going to bookmark this page and come back to it in a couple weeks when I am probably about to pull my hair out... Hopefully they give you some good advice / tips / suggestions.

Also, I love that last pic of J. He looks so grown up there.

Bama Belle... said...

can;t help you there but i think the little one keeps getting cuter and cuter with every picture i see!

Courtney said...

Hi there! First of all, Baby J is just adorable! I had a baby last year (acutally, it will be one year next weekend!) and breastfed for 11 months. I gave Jeb our baby a pacifier almost immediately after bringing him home. It satisfied him in between feedings (or else I think he would have nursed for hours on end!) and definitely did not affect him negatively as far as nursing was concerned. I started pumping when he was about two weeks old, and honestly, I wish I had done it sooner! I was able to pump enough so that my husband was able to give the baby a bottle during one of his night-time feedings, therefore giving me a good 4-5 hour stretch of uninterrupted sleep! I was confused at first as to when to pump; I soon realized that if I pumped about a 1/2 hour after the baby's morning nursing session (when I seemed to have the most milk), that would give me at least a couple of ounces. Then I would pump one more time right before bed so that I wouldn't get engorged (sorry if that's TMI) since my husband would be giving him a bottle at around midnight.
With regards to drinking - I waited until the baby was about a month old, and I was told to have a glass of wine right after he nursed, so that it would be out of my system by the time he wanted to eat again (2-3 hours later). Hope that helps!

Beth said...

I strictly breastfed for (no bottles) for at least a month, but then immediately introduced them so that they would not reject a bottle either. Paci's came pretty much right away and did not affect nursing. I had good nursers. Every baby is different so do what works for you and your little one.

Mary Avery said...

My MIL was the same way, as she did not brfeed her children. Mine never took a paci really, so I can't help there. I had a VERY fussy baby but after a few weeks we figured out that my prenatal vitamin was giving him SO much gas. I still can't take it. My lactation consultant had never heard of this but I eventually DID find it in THE bible for breastfeeding: La Leche League's "The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding". I still use it for information and my son is 9 mos old.
Also, I had to cut out ALL milk products and anything tomato based. This was hard to do b/c it was summer and I wanted tomato sandwiches so badly! It just made him gassy and no amount of mylicon would help. We found that Gripe Water helped more than Mylicon. It DID help me lose massive amounts of weight to cut all that out!
Stick with it! It's so rewarding. I've fed through mastities, low supply, a baby that fed almost every hour for months, and a fussy baby that cried for 14 weeks. You're giving him so many antibodies and nutrients that no formula can compare to! You'll find what works best for you and your baby and that's what will work at the end of the day! Roll Tide!

CLuthren said...

I asked the nurse to get my son a pacifer in the hospital. He loves it and still does (he is one now). He never had any problems with breastfeeding or bottlefeeding because of a pacifier. They really just help soothe them - espically at night.

As for pumping- I started after two weeks. You can also just feed on one boob completely and then pump the other side to store some up. Trust me there will be a time when you don't want to get up and it is nice to have someone else give him a bottle (and know that it is breastmilk). I also think that you want to get your child used to both- what are you going to do if they never want to take a bottle and you have to go back to work? I have found that little boys like to eat and dont really care how they get it!

As for foods you shouldn't eat. Green stuff gives them gas, caffeine gives them gas(I drank one a day anyway- you have to have it when you are so tired) and cheese or milk products. They say if you notice they are really gassy- watch what you just ate and try to eliminate something for a week and see if it helps.

Good luck! It is the hardest thing you will ever do but the most rewarding!

The Jarrell's said...

I had to avoid drinking milk and eating lettuce with my son. I started pumping when he was 2 wks old. He had the pacifier but didn't fully like it until I was weaning him.

CRICKET said...

Congrats on your new baby. I breastfeed my first child for 20 months and am currently breastfeeding my second who is 16 months. If you still have any questions, email me at
Hope it has gotten easier!

Hang in There! said...

Definitely give the binky! It is so soothing to babies. :)

The best advice my daughter's pediatrician gave me when I was nursing was to give her ten-fifteen minutes on each side and then give her the pacificer. Originally, she was spending thirty minutes on each side and it was killing me! Her ped informed me that she was getting her full nutrition in the first few minutes and using the rest of the time as a pacifier. Hope this helps!

The George Family said...

I would try the paci- you have been breastfeeding for three weeks, so it shouldn't be a huge issue yet.

I would also suggest pumping now,I started right about 3 weeks- mostly so that my husband could get up in the middle of the night to give a bottle.

I had my first glass of wine about 4 weeks after the baby (we had a baby party, and I thought that I deserved just one) I was able to have it right after he nursed to go down for bed, and since I was pumping I was able to pump and dump one time and had enough reserved to get him a bottle in the middle of the night.

Good luck, don't let your MIL get you down- both my mom and my MIL didn't understand the issues- just do what you are most comfortable with!

Kelly said...

Okay you asked here goes!!! We did not give Tay a paci until she was 1month old...Advice from her pediatrician! I counted down the seconds! Truth be told I will give my 2nd child the Paci immediatley!
I started pumping right away!! My boobs were huge and hard she was not eating a we saved a ton! Which came in handy when I had an adult beverage! One or two drinks is not going to effect your little one at all. If you decided to tie one on...."pumping and dumping" is the best advice....When it is time for a bottle and you want Daddy to do it, I suggest not being in the room so she doesn't smell all your deliciousness ie..breastmilk!
My daughter had a VERY sensitive I did not eat spicy or gassey foods ie...crawfish-(im from the south) red beans,etc. When we did start on the formula we used the Gentle-ease it worked for us! Tay had COLIC and I swear by Colic-ease....just in is the BEST stuff ever!!!
Relax and enjoy this bonding time with your son, no matter how long it lasts!!!! I promise you will miss it when it is over!

Anonymous said...

I wandered onto your blog fom Kelly's and have never commented but breastfeeding is something I feel very strongly about encouraging! I have an almost 22 month old daughter who still nurses and would have it no other way! As for your questions, there are really no right or wrong answers on the pacis. As many have already commented, it just depends on the baby. My daughter began taking one alomost immediately after arriving home (my mom who was a la leche league leader for years and years was actually the one who thought she needed it). Even with my daughter needing extra training on latching and me using a nipple shield for the first few weeks to help her learn, she managed just fine! As for pumping, do it whenever you want. Babies are much more adaptable than we give them credit for. Although I rarely pumped (I have always had a hard time with it and I stay at home with her so it is just much easier) I did let my husband be the one to first introduce the bottle to her. Have yours hold her close to his chest in a similar position as you nursing and that helps a lot. Skin to skin contact encourages this even further if he is willing. I found it easiest to pump very firt thing in the morning when my supply was the highest or right after a feeding when the flow was good.

The alcohol question is of great debate. The best advice is if you are feeding them on a "demand" schedule, it really is best just to abstain or feed stored milk. If you are feeding on a schedule, this makes it a bit easier. Check out this link for more detailed info.

La Leche League leaders used to encourage women to sip a glass of wine to help with let down; many people have survived this! You have to decide what you think is best.

You should be able to eat whatever you like unless baby shows signs of needing to make diet changes. I was pretty fortunate in that very little bothered my daughter.

A great manual to read is the Womanly Art of Breastfeeding- it's a La Leche League manual. Also the La Leche League website
offers many answers, people to call, as well as breastfeeding support groups you can join. The majority of my mom's best friends all met while attending these meetings 33 plus years ago when my sister was born. It is also a great way to connect with others who have kids even if you aren't having nursing problems, etc. Good luck!

Anonymous said...

First of all, this is great that you are bfeeding, because it is a commitment you make to your baby AND it is the ultimate bonding experience. My babies are now 30 and 19 with their own children, but some things never change...this is as old as time, after all. I nursed both of them until they were ready to wean themselves (one at 21 mos. the other at 26 months). I tried a paci with both, one liked it, and the other found her thumb and was a thumb-sucker (no problems with nursing resulted).

Basically, I pumped from the early days, yes, it is frustrating at first, but it became much easier as I became used to the routine, was not sore, and generally felt better from my C-section. I also think that as your milk supply builds, the process becomes much quicker.

Finally, your instinct as a mama is your guide. You may be new to the game, but your baby knows and responds to you and your lead. I am honest when I say that I nursed my babies everywhere unbeknownst to anyone...the grocery store, the movies, numerous restaurants, the park, shopping malls, sporting events...and this was 30 years ago! That is the beauty of nursing-it can be done anywhere, anytime. I never made a big deal out of it, never exposed myself, and only my closest friends knew what I was doing. But, boy my babies did. And they are happy, healthy adults today.
You can do this, and you don't need to worry about anything but enjoying your baby. PS All 4 of my grandchildren were bfed too, and they are thriving toddlers!
Best wishes! Gale

MindyMac said...

Hey there! I'm a random "blog stalker" that just popped in and read this post! I just finished breastfeeding my second baby and I can tell you that every baby is different! I allowed both of mine a pacifier and a bottle at the hospital right after they were born, and neither have had any problems with "nipple confusion". Babies need to suck a lot, and your baby might need more sucking time than nursing allows. I was a big proponent of parent-directed feeding, meaning that I basically went by the clock, but was happy to comply if baby was obviously hungry at an odd time. I did not demand feed, as I think it messes with baby's digestive system and really doesn't promote full feedings and getting the hind milk that is rich and filling. As for wine, my dr. told me that when it leaves your body via the potty, it's out of your breast milk as well, so have a glass! It will help you relax! : ) And as for pumping, if baby is happy after feedings, then your supply is probably fine and I wouldn't worry about it. I did get the advice to give 1 bottle a day, and I think it really is good advice. I didn't do it with my first and she had a terrible time taking to the bottle when I was through bf-ing. My second had no problems at all, and also had 1 bottle a day from birth. So there is 2 cents from a total stranger! Your baby is precious! Sounds like you are doing a great job!

Raul. Lily & Mason said...

C1.My son was born 2 months early so the NICU gave him a a paci we have not had any problems and we have been BF for 9 months now.

2. I agree star pumping now it hard sometimes but it will build up your supply and its good to have if you need to take a break

3. I have had a glass of wine but I do it after he has ate or wait for about a hour before he feeds again.

4.My son does not really have issues with what I eat. I do watch how much spicy stuff I eat . I have a friend who really can not eat broccoli and all those gassy foods because her little girl will get reflex. Just watch what you eat and if you baby seems upset you can cross that food out of your diet

BF is really about determination. We have exclusively BF since the beginning and people said I would not be able to do it because my son was a preemie. A good book to read is “the womanly art of breast feeding” by La le leche league. Let your MIL know very clearly that you plan BF and not to give formula. We have not had to use any and from what I heard it can lower your supply because it is more filing . Try finding a la leche group neer you they have helped me out a lot or other BF moms. In the beginning to make nursing at night easier we co slept but now he sleep in hi own crib with out any problems.
Here are some web sites that have helped me

Enjoy BF its the best feeling in the world!!!!

MMM said...

Thanks everyone for your comments and suggestions!!! I appreciate each and every one of them!!

3 Peanuts said...

Your little man is BEAUTIFUL! Sorry I cannot offer advice. I tried SO hard at breast-feeding but both my boys had issues and could not latch on. It was awful.

Blessings to you:)


ktarbell43 said...

Hi! Congrats on the sweet little boy. Hang in there with the nursing the first few weeks are the hardest. I have been nursing for 6 months now and plan to continue until my boy is 1. I waited 2 weeks before giving my son a pacifer, but as long as he's nursing well, it probably isn't an issue.

As far as pumping goes I started pumping around day 5. I had a ridiculous supply of milk and I was very engorged I started pumping in order to avoid a breast infection, once my milk leveled out I continued to pump daily.

Can't help you on the drink issue, but as far as food goes each baby is different. My son was very irritated by milk products and products that have caffeine (including chocolate). You kind of have to figure it out for yourself. Definitely stay away from refried beans. I also stayed away from broccoli, asparagus, and cabbage. My son didn't start showing signs of irritation until 2 weeks when he develop a little reflux. I went of all the trigger foods (you can find a list on the internet) and slowly reintroduced them into my diet to find out what bothered him.

Good luck

TCP said...

I started pumping while I was still in the hospital for a variety of reasons, so I don't think there's such thing as too early.

And we also waited on pacifiers and bottles because of the whole "nipple confusion" issue, but he had no trouble going back and forth once we did add those things in (around 3 weeks, I think?)

good luck!!!

four4now said...

I found your blog through Kelly's....
I'm assuming you have already gotten plenty of answers on breastfeeding but if not, feel free to email or stop by my blog.

I've nursed 4 children anywhere from a year to almost 2 years each and have one more to go (womb dweller :)) so I tend to get quite a few emails and calls! :)

Hope all is well. Your baby is precious!


Anderson Family said...

Hi I am a mother of 4 little rugrats! haha jk I really enjoy every minute I have with my kids! But I am a BIG beliver in the Binky/Pacifier! I never once had Nipple confusion with any of my 4 kids! I am sure there are some who have, but Its not that common. and by now I would think you would be out of the woods! And I dont have all the statistic on SIDS, but I have heard that an infant is much less (like 96% less) likely to die from SIDS if they have a binky/pacifier! That was enough right there to convince me to give one to my babies! It is also alot easier of a habit to break than sucking on a thumb or lip or tongue! at about the age of 9-10months I start leaving the binky in the bed and they only get it at nap/bedtime!(this makes them love going to bed and nap/bedtime so much easier) and then at about 16-18 months (its when I feel emotionally ready to deal with the crying) I take it away all together! I just took my youngest Adi's Binky away 3 weeks ago. she cried for about 2 hours the first night and hasn't cried since! It has been so nice!
In terms of pumping.. Well I only pumped when I was gonna burst! So I am not the greatest at giving advise on this one. But If you are planning on working or leaving him for more than a few feedings a week then I would for sure start now. If not I never thought formula was that bad for those rare feedings when I was away.
I am not a drinker of any sort. I dont know much about drinking, but I would really put your baby first for the time being. Learn to relax in a different way. There will be plenty of time later to drink something.
Good Luck to you and Congrats
Mom of 4 from Utah

Brittany said...

Hey sweetie, I randomly stumbled onto your blog, and am currently breastfeeding. Here's what I've discovered through personal experience:

*Pacifiers- I was also told sternly not to give my baby a pacifier until the first month. Around 1 month is supposed to be a great time to start introducing them to pacifiers and bottle nipples. I didn't give him a pacifier until around this time; however, he has had 1 bottle a day since about 2 weeks old. This started when I was badly engorged on one side and the other was so sore from feeding constantly it cracked). He has had no problem adjusting to fake nipples but prefers the real one. The only time he'll take a pacifier is if he's sleepy but not hungry.

*Drinking- If you do drink and are breastfeeding, wait until right after he/she eats. And obviously don't get completely wasted, or the alcohol in your system will pass on to the baby.

*Pumping- I don't know about having dad bottle feed, because my husband is in Iraq...however, the only reasons you would need to pump right now are: 1) if you need to go back to work, or 2) if you can only nurse on one side due to complications of breastfeeding.

*Foods to avoid- I was told to stay away from anything you don't tolerate well, like spicy foods. I've heard to avoid caffeine, but after about a week of all-nighters, I ditched that theory. He's had no problems with sleeping or being gassy due to caffeine!

It's all about trial and error and really what your baby likes and you're comfortable with! :)

The Mrs. said...

I say paci can be given right away, never was a problem here. same with pumping and bottle. You have to make it easy on yourself. You are committed and it will happen! I did have glasses of wine and just made sure a couple hours went by. Also no spicy food or major veggie intake. Landon had acid reflux so previcid fixed him right up!

erin said...

Pump now if you can because if your baby won't take a bottle - that is a nightmare. Give him a pacifier if needed - mine never took one - liked the real boobs instead.
I pumped with my first born, and did very little with the other ones - but probably should have.

Melissa said...

Hi, firt, congratulation on your darling son. And I say, for heaven's sake give the pacifier! I was hesitant at first but my daughter was really fussy so I got to that point, and it never has interfered w/breastfeeding. It is a life-saver at times. I also have supplemented her eating with formula, a few oz at night before bed, when my supply is the lowest, and since we have done that from the beginning, she has never had a problem confusing the two and has always been a good breastfeeder, though it was really hard for me at first! Also, I pumped early too, in order to build up a reserve- so start now if you can. You're doing great though!

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